Saturday, July 11, 2015

Money has different names !!!

Money has different names !!! 
In temple  its called Daan, in school its (fee), 
in marriage it's called (dowry), 
in divorce (alimony), 
when u owe someone its (debt ), 
when u pay the government (tax), 
in court (fines), 
civil servant retirees (pension)
 boss to workers (salary),
 master to subordinates (wages), 
children (maintenance), 
when u borrow from bank (loan),
 when u offer after a service (tip), 
to kidnappers(ransom)
illegally received in d name of service (bribe). 

The question is "when a Husband gives to his Wife what do we call it?? Answer________.? 

Thursday, April 10, 2014

Rules of Friendship

NICE Rules Of
   F. R. I. E. N. D. S. H. I. P

              NEVER ASK
                For A Hug
              Just Take It

                NEVER ASK
            "Do U miss me?"
               Say "I Miss U"

                 NEVER ASK
           "Can U Help Me?"
        Say "Do This For Me"

                 NEVER SAY
       I Can't Live Without U
               Say I Live 4 U

LAST But Not The LEAST

               NEVER SAY
 Thankyou, Sorry, Please,
 Instead Say Anytime 4 U

          D E D I C A T E D

 To All My Lovely Friends  

True Freindship

A frndsip story:

1st frnd: Dekh maine nya mobil liya..
2nd frnd: Waah, chal party de fir me tuze gift duga.

Sham ko wo hotel gye.
(after dinner)
2nd frnd: Tumne hotel me khane ka intzam kaise kiya.?

1st frnd: Mobile bechke..
Teri khushi se badhkar thodi ku6 hai.?

2nd frnd: saale, mujhe pata tha, tu aisa hi krega..

Isliye maine tera becha hua mobile us dukan se le liya tha... Le tera gift..!

"Zindagi me Dost nhi, Dosto me Zindagi hai"

its a really true friendship:-*

Thursday, February 20, 2014

Must Read interview you will enjoy it

One mind blowing interview read it completly.

Interviewer : Tell me about yourself.
Candidate: I ...am Rameshwar Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Inst it ute of Technology.

Interviewer : BabanRao Dhole-Patil Inst it ute of Technology? I had never heard of this college before!
Candidate : Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission into it ..
What happened is – due to cricket world cup I scored badly! in 12th.I was getting a paid seat in a good college. But my father said (I prefer to call him ‘baap’) – “I can not invest so much of money”.(The baap actually said – “I will never waste so much of money on you”). So I had to join this college. Frankly speaking this name – BabanRao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya

Interviewer: ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering.
Candidate : Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you know, these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments. It is difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years.

Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6.
Candidate: Oh, is it ? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try to keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really affect exams a lot.. I think they should ban it .

Interviewer : Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned.
Candidate : No, no… I am talking about Exams!!

Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?
Candidate : Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I would complete it . In fact, when I flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in BEST (Bus
corporation in Maharashtra ) through some relative.

Interviewer : Do you have any plans of higher study?
Candidate: he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing ‘lower’ education it self was so much of pain!!

Interviewer : Let’s talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you worked?
Candidate : Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current platforms. Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As you can see I have experience of different platforms! (Vashi and Andheri are the places in Mumbai)

Interviewer : And which languages have you used?
Candidate : Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German, French, Russian and many other languages.

Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB?
Candidate : It is a common sense – C comes after B. So VC is a higher version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up w it h a new language VD!

Interviewer: Do you know anything about Assembly Language?
Candidate: Well, I have not heard of it . But I guess, this is the language our ministers and MPs use in assembly.

Interviewer : What is your general project experience?
Candidate : My general experience about projects is – most of the times they are in pipeline!

Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job?
Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata Info Tech ltd. Since joining BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that Bench was another software like Windows.

Interviewer : Do you have any project management experience?
Candidate: No, but I guess it shouldn’t be difficult. I know Word and Excel. I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone call and use speaker facility. And very important – I know few words like – ‘Showstoppers ‘ , ‘hot fixes’, ‘SEI-CMM’, ‘quality’, ‘version control’, ‘deadlines’ , ‘Customer Satisfaction’ etc. Also I can blame others for my mistakes!

Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company?
Candidate : Not much.
1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand..
2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent.
3. I believe in flexi-timings.
4. Dress Code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt and jeans.
5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest Wednesday off also, so as to avoid breakdown due to overwork.
6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably 1-2 months) assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe. But considering the fact that there are Olympics coming up in China in the current year, I don’t mind going there in that period. As you can see I am modest and don’t have many expectations. So can I assume my selection?

Interviewer : he he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our
organization. In fact I was never entertained so much before. Welcome to INFOSYS.

The fellow was appointed in a newly created section ‘Stress Management’ in the HRD of Infosys.

So Excellence is not the only thing Needed. Its the Unique Quality of a Person which can let anyone to Success. Work on Your own Field rather then following somebody else's Path

Sunday, February 9, 2014

YOU WILL SURELY BELIVE THAT RAMAYNA WAS TRUE

YOU WILL SURELY BELIVE THAT RAMAYNA WAS TRUE

You Must Watch That Video as it provides strength to your belives








Saturday, February 8, 2014

Ultimate Bargain

 ðŸ“Œultimate bargain.        

A Man telephones a Dentist to inquire about the cost for tooth extraction.

Dentist: Rs 850 Sir.

Man : Rs 850!!! Too much! Don't you have anything cheaper?

Dentist: That's the normal charge, Sir.

Man: What if you don't use any anesthetic?

Dentist: That's unusual, Sir, but can be done and will cut the cost by Rs 150.

Man : Ok. And what if you deploy one of your trainee-dentists to do the extraction, without anesthetic?

Dentist: Well, I cannot guarantee professionalism and it also would be painful. But the price could drop down to Rs 400.

Man: Hmm. What if you make it like a training-session, like one of your students does the extraction, while the other students watch and learn?

Dentist: It'll be good for the students but quite traumatic. I will charge you Rs 50 for it.

Man: Now you're talking! Ok, it's a deal. Can I confirm an appointment for my mother-in-law for tomorrow then?

Very True

 Very True Saying ..
"नींद तो बचपन में आती थी ,

अब तो बस थक कर सो जाते है "


Ek bar engineering ke sabhi Professores ko
ek plane mein bithaya gaya..

Fir announce kiya gaya ki
YE PLANE APKE STUDENTS NE BNAYA HAI”

Sab profesrs utar gaye…
Par principal baithe rahe

Logo ne pucha: Aapko Darr nahi lgta?

Principle: Muje apne studnts par pura bharosa hai.

Ye start hi nahi hoga!!